Had my first bad week of the year, but I've been waiting for it to happen so I guess I shouldn't be so surprised. But anyway, time to vent, let it all out, and move on because I have A LOT of studying to do.
Last weekend I went to Pasadena for the weekend to hike the Hollywood Sign trail with friends, so I didn't have the chance to study for my dosage calculation test that was on Monday. It was my fault for putting it off, but I think that's what set me on edge for the whole week since I went to sleep all stressed out on Sunday night. Then on Monday I also got my Nutrition quiz results back and I didn't do so well. I took long naps on Monday night and Tuesday night, so I was unproductive on both nights when I should have been studying. I missed my daily Mon. & Tues. workout times too. Knowing that I have 3 exams next week is giving me an anxiety attack and I know that I am stressed when I find reasons to NOT be productive. I am super bummed that I couldn't join the LOG Vegas trip this weekend because I know that this was one of the few chances I had to spend a weekend with all of them outside of Liwanag events/functions. I was also homesick. And I think all of the above sums up why I had a crappy week. I need to get my shit together.
I was ready to call an end to the week on Thursday. I was annoyed that the patients on the floor didn't have interesting diagnoses, so I took my negative energy with me to clinicals that morning. But thankfully, it turned out to be one of the best clinical days I've had all year. My patient was SO cooperative and kind. Seeing that strength in an older person is really humbling and I definitely needed that. Also, I sensed that my patient's spouse needed someone to talk to, so I decided to stay in the room and listen. We shared stories and had a few laughs and I received some great advice. I could really see how much they both loved eachother and it was inspiring. True love really is sticking next to the one you love through sickness and health. I'm keeping them in my prayers and hoping for the best. I feel like God assigned me that patient as a reminder to stop stressing out over the little things that I have control over. Being in nursing school has given me greater appreciation for living a healthy life and to not take anything for granted. I love what I'm doing, I just needed to remind myself why. My purpose is greater than getting good grades in school- it's to be His hands, His compassion, and His love for every single patient that I have.
So yes, stress is part of this nursing journey, but I can't let it overwhelm me. I'm hopping back on the positive train and I'm going to have a productive weekend here at home. Of course I'd rather be in Vegas, but I guess I wasn't meant to go this time.
Attitude is everything! I have faith that I will do well next week :) Prayers please.
