I have to remember that EVERYONE has bad days and YES, that includes ME.
This past week wasn't my best. I didn't do well on my OB exam and I had a tough day on Friday as well. I've been behind in my work lately and so frustrated with myself. I anticipated that a "cry out your frustration" kind-of-day was near and I was right. In nursing school, these kind of days are inevitable. If anyone disagrees with me, then I highly admire them for their strength, because there are days when I just feel like calling it quits. I'm balancing school and my other major priority right now, along with upcoming PCN workshops that I'll be teaching. Its been a major setback trying to manage my time between everything and it even feels impossible sometimes.
But...I just have to grit my teeth and get my shit done. I chose these goals for myself and I need to try my best to make all ends meet, no matter how tired I am mentally, physically, and emotionally. I'm human and I make mistakes, but that doesn't mean I should stop trying. I'm starting Week 7 tomorrow, so I've made it pretty much halfway throughout the semester. Time just flew by and I'm kind of glad it did, but it just makes it seem like there is so much work to get done in such a short span of time.
I'm trying my best to maintain my sense of well-being. I know that's something we assess in patients for nursing school on a daily basis, but I never even take the time to assess my own. I learned from my mistake of being socially and spiritually withdrawn last semester. It was one of the lowest points in my life. So now, I'm taking the time in the mornings to pray the rosary on the way to school, taking naps when needed, working out at least 3-4 times a week, studying for school and other things as much as possible, and most importantly, taking time put from studying to spend time with family & friends at home. I'm not wasting my time, I'm filling it with priorities that are keeping me sane, if that's the best way to put it.
Whatever is meant to be, will be. Everything is not under my control, but I know that I should be pushing myself a little bit harder every week. The little things shouldn't be taken in vain and I want to apply the new things that I am learning into my life to become a better person. I'm choosing a life that's dedicated to serving others. I didn't choose nursing to be rich or recognized. I chose nursing because I want to make a difference, no matter how big or small. I get the biggest joy out of making a patient and their families smile. I could live with that feeling for the rest of my life and I don't want how much money I have in my bank account to reflect the kind of person that I am or how much I'm worth. I am a child of God, nothing more or nothing less and I am not backing down.
She’s living in a world and it’s on fire
Filled with catastrophe, but she knows she can fly away
Oh, she got both feet on the ground
And she’s burning it down
Oh, she got her head in the clouds
And she’s not backing down
This girl is on fire
This girl is on fire
She’s walking on fire
This girl is on fire
